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  Under The Influence - Bar Jokes - Quit While You're A Head

 A man is waiting for wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and
 informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs.
 
 The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him
 as well as he can, with love and compassion.
 
 After 21 years, the son is old enough for his first drink. Dad
 takes him to the bar and tearfully tells the son he is proud of
 him. Dad orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With
 all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender
 shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of
 alcohol.
 
 Swoooop! A torso pops out! The bar is dead silent; then bursts
 into a whoop of joy. The father, shocked, begs his son to drink
 again. The patrons chant, "Take another drink!" The bartender
 still shakes his head in dismay. Swoooop! Two arms pops out.
 The bar goes wild.
 
 The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. The
 patrons chant, "Take another drink!" The bartender ignores the
 whole affair. By now the boy is getting tipsy, and with his new
 hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it.
 Swoooop! Two legs pop out.
 
 The bar is in chaos. The father falls to his knees and tearfully
 thanks God. The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the
 left... then to the right... right through the front door, into
 the street, where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly. 
 
 The bar falls silent. The father moans in grief. The bartender
 sighs and says, "That boy should have quit while he was a head"

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